 Charlie Clone |
Welcome to Charlie Clone's All Action Figure Revue at SWAFT.info! I'm your host, Charlie Clone! |
| This
time, AAFR investigates a key 3.75” scale member of the Rescue Squad / Emergency
Joint Forces / Emergency Team Play Set, from
the enigmatic Dollar Tree Distributors in the lost city of Chesapeake,
VA. I also picked up this particular gem for a mere fifty-cent piece, plus additional tax. It does come with a choking hazard, so all you three year olds are going to have to rely on the less well-equipped Little People medical unit for the time being. |
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CONCEPT: You know you are in for double the action when the word “Emergency” appears twice in a toy’s name. And I’m glad to know that the longstanding animosity between the Firefighter Force, Paramedic Force, and Police Force was set aside so they could be Joint Forces against their common foe of emergencies. The particular Rescue Squad Emergency Joint Forces Emergency Team Play Set up for review today is some kind of female paramedic. The femaleness is enough to make this a highly sought-after member of the force, since, as we all know, lonely action figure collectors always dig the chick figs. Otherwise,
I suppose someone thought they were doing a great
service to young women around the world by making a female action
figure. Usually female dollar store toys are cheap Barbie knockoffs, or
reverse-engineered My Little Ponies. Not that I ever look in the pink
aisle. Or maybe the designers thought that it would be educational for young boys to explore their own gender identity while helping people in emergency situations. I'm not sure whether this is better or worse than saving the world with Dino Power Ninjatron Ravager Action. At the very least, this unique figure stands apart in a world of cheap generic soldiers, robot ninja, and aliens with unidentifiable physical features. |
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ACCESSORIES:
The
accessories alone warrant purchasing this figure.
Actually, they are the only reason I bought it.
Seriously.
I'm very good at talking to real women...in
person even.
Anyway, this figure comes equipped with all the tools a paramedic needs to assist an emergency victim: surgical scissors, syringe, world’s largest flashlight, stethoscope, and...(this is the good part)...a complete defibrillator.
Oh, yes, I wrote “a complete defibrillator.” It’s a little blue box with a heart monitor, shoulder strap, and two long springy cords ending in two electrical paddles. This is the only complete defibrillator I have ever seen rendered in a 3.75” scale.
The accessories are grossly disproportionate, but perhaps she will find them useful in warding off other action figures that come packed with things like knives, guns, and swords.
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FEATURES: I continue to be impressed with the amount of detail on these figures. The paintjob on her face is lacking, but she has real translucent pink emergency goggles over her pigmentless eyes. The goggles are secured into slots along her temples. She also has a translucent water bottle (with painted lid and holder) on her left hip. Her right hip has a green first aid kit with white medicine bottles molded onto it. The figure features articulation at the neck, hips, and shoulders. One flaw is that the slave-laborers forgot to paint the middle of her backside...but I don’t want to make too much of that, lest their overlords read this and punish them cruelly. |
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There are also numerous little doodads molded onto her jeans, like another flashlight and a ginormous mechanical pen. These details easily get lost in the dark blue plastic, but a daring customizer could probably accentuate these details.
The most seriously flaw, however, is that her leg's dramatic “emergency rescue action” pose makes her a little unbalanced. You can easily overcome this by arching her back slightly, but then she looks a little immodest, like she’s thinking “Hey, Destro, why don’t you look over here...oh, yeah, I know what you like...” or something.
I've kissed a girl before.
Honest.
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PLAY VALUE: Sure, there are other more expensive medic figures that you could buy to patch up your Joes or Republican Clones...but do any of them come with a stinking defibrillator? I’ve watched medical dramas, and I know that those things are like resurrection machines. Don’t you care enough about your action figures to get them the very best in affordable health care? |
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| Until next time...
--Charlie Clone |
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